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Free Advice From a Mentor

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(Note: When I wrote this early in my blog’s history, when I was a senior executive for a Fortune 150 financial services firm. Now with the added perspective of an entrepreneur and consultant, I find the words truer than ever.)

I have mentored dozens of young professionals over the years, and even though each situation is unique, I always end up giving these three pieces of advice. It’s not like I planned it all out, or even wrote it out before now, but here they are:

  1. There is no secret handshake
  2. Focus on getting better, not getting credentials
  3. It all starts with you

There is no secret handshake

The CEO of a venture-backed technology company whom I know well once asked me: “Do you ever get the feeling that when someone comes to you for career advice, what they’re really looking for is the secret handshake?” 

Yes, I have gotten that feeling.

My best mentoring relationships have involved mentees who truly want to improve their performance, learn new skills, take on more responsibility or just learn more about what a potential career path might look like for them.

The best way to ensure that a mentoring relationship with me is short (and not particularly rewarding for either of us) is to mistake it as an opportunity to simply learn the secret handshake.

Do you really think I’ll hire you or connect you with someone merely because you want more money or a better title?

Put some clothes on that naked ambition, you’ll catch a cold.

Focus on getting better, not getting credentials

I often get questions like “Should I get an MBA (or any one of the alphabet soup of certifications in the financial industry: CFA, CFP®, CIMA, CTFA, etc.)?”

My consistent answer to all who ask is that if you want to learn more about that particular area and want to study it deeper, go for it. I’m a big believer of continuous learning, and earlier in my career I worked to get an MBA and put a few initials after my own name.

On the other hand, if you think that simply tacking those initials after your name will open a whole new world for you, you will probably be disappointed.

I still remember a soon-to-be-freshly-minted MBA who wanted to ‘remind’ me that he would have this very important graduate degree by the time of his next performance review, and that he hoped that would qualify him for a promotion.

I ‘reminded’ him that he was still the same person with the same level of performance, so probably not.

It all starts with you

This is kind of a two-for-one. First, I mean that before you start on any exploration of future paths, you need to understand your strengths, your passions, what gives you energy and what saps you dry.

I also mean that the whole process of working with a mentor isn’t a passive activity of absorbing second-hand knowledge through osmosis.

I was very proud and excited when my company asked me a few years ago to participate in the pilot of a program called MentorConnect, kind of an internal match.com to put mentors and mentees together based on specific skills and experiences.

I learned to start by asking mentees to share any relevant standardized test results they may have taken recently (Meyers-Briggs, PDI, StrengthsFinder, DiSC, etc.), and if they didn’t have any, I had them start with StrengthsFinder 2.0. Not only did this help give the mentee and me a logical starting place, it helped to quickly identify those who were only looking for the secret handshake. Those types often would not do the work.

I also recall the bright young assistant who was referred to me by her boss for some career advice a few years ago. She wasn’t sure what she wanted, but she was sure she should be higher in the organization by now. I took her to lunch, and we talked for an hour and a half. I gave her a couple of books to read for our subsequent meetings. I must have followed up three of four times when I ran into her, but she hadn’t quite found the time to even buy the books, let alone read them.

I guess I wasn’t completely surprised when she dropped by a couple of months later to let me know she was quitting the firm.

She was going to work on her MBA.

And no doubt continue her quest for that elusive secret handshake.

Why Your Team Is Not Successful

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Struggling to understand why your team is not successful?

As a leader, it’s your job to figure out the answers. Here are five questions to ask yourself:

  1. Is everyone on the team clear about the team’s overall goal and their specific objectives?
  2. Do each member’s objectives tie out to the overall team goal?
  3. Does every member of the team have the ability and the drive to achieve their objectives?
  4. Is everyone held accountable for achieving their objectives?
  5. Does your culture support and encourage constant learning, growth and adjustment?

Is everyone on the team clear about the team’s overall goal and their specific objectives?

A survey conducted by the consulting firm Partners in Leadership found that 84% of respondents “indicated that changing priorities create confusion around the key results the organization needs to achieve“ (emphasis mine). Everyone on your team needs to have a consistent answer to the question “What are our overarching goals?” Otherwise, everyone is not “rowing in the same direction”, as the saying goes.

Do each member’s objectives tie out to the overall team goal?

False success is worse than clear failure. Failure is important, healthy and good. Failure teaches you what did not work if you are brave enough to embrace the lessons learned and make adjustments in the future (see below). False success comes from creating individual victories for the members of your team that don’t add up to team success. Individuals should have goals that are highly aligned with things within their control (sales, audit results, client satisfaction, etc.), but they should also be aligned with the goals and needs of the entire team or organization. There is no real victory in celebrating a bunch of individual “winners” if it doesn’t add up to a team win. Chicago Bulls coach Phil Jackson’s goal was not for Michael Jordan to necessarily average 35 points a game, it was for the Bulls to win the NBA championship.

Does every member of the team have the ability and the drive to achieve their objectives?

It’s important to be brutally honest about the ability (skill) and drive (will) of each member of the team. Skill without will is worthless, and you will be doing the rest of your team a favor by separating those players from your team. Will without skill is preferable, but not everyone can be trained to do the job adequately. Think about moving these players to a role to which they may be better suited.

Is everyone held accountable for achieving their objectives?

Nothing hurts team morale and undermines top performers’ discretionary effort than seeing those around them fail to be held accountable for underperformance. Ensuring accountability without devolving into finger pointing is an art well covered in the book The Oz Principle: Getting Results Through Individual and Organizational Accountability.

Does your culture support and encourage constant learning, growth and adjustment?

Ray Dalio, the founder of acclaimed hedge fund Bridgewater Associates, has written and shares freely an amazing piece of managerial advice which he titles, simply: Principles. It is available in its entirety from the firm’s website. It is a treasure trove of quotables (sure to be shared in future posts), but the relevant advice here is in a section he calls “To Get the Culture Right…”

Create a Culture in Which It Is OK to Make Mistakes

but Unacceptable Not to Identify, Analyze, and Learn From Them

If you can answer yes to each of those questions, your team is surely on its way to success.